Category Archives: Explicit Advisory

Who has more balls?

Open mouth, insert foot. That’s what I needed to do Sunday at church. I volunteer as an MC for the children’s program (grades 1 thru 5). My job is basically to introduce the video lesson that gets projected onto a huge screen and then to quiz the kids when the video is over. The kids are divided into teams and each team is given points, awarded with plastic balls, for each question answered correctly. When it came time to tally up the points and find a winner, this is what I said, “Being on God’s Team, we are all winners but let’s see which team here has more balls.” Apparently, kids aren’t the only ones that “say the darnedest things.” The moment it came out of my mouth, I knew I made a boo-boo; and that was confirmed by the expression of silent chuckles on the faces of all the adults in the room. Thankfully, I don’t think any of the kids are familiar enough with the lewd figure of speech to understand it. Thankfully, God has a sense of humor (I’m proof). Most importantly, God is a God of second chances so they may still let me work with the kids again next week.

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