Here is a poem that I quickly put together based on true events as told by a family member on Black Friday. The names have been left out to protect the innocent. Enjoy, it’s hilarious:
From travel, turkey, and all Thanksgiving tradition,
Too sleepy to stay up for the late news edition.
They scurry to bed without even a yawn,
To sleep until morning but wake before dawn.
After 40-plus years they know just the trick,
“We’ll ‘fondle’ each other till our eyelids get thick!”
She turns in the bed and he scratches her back,
With hopes to nod off, for it’s sleep that they lack.
The plan is not working, they’re still wide awake,
Then her butt made a sound I think in mistake.
A terror awaits while it creeps up the sheet,
The fragrance is foul and it’s not from her feet.
“The nerve!” he says as he crinkles his nose,
“I scratch your back and you let out one of those!”
She turns with a grin in under a blink,
With a funny response to explain the whole stink.
“You’ve known me for years; why, what did you expect?”
“I’m a ‘scratch n’ sniff model;’ now, rub my neck.”