Who has more balls?

Open mouth, insert foot. That’s what I needed to do Sunday at church. I volunteer as an MC for the children’s program (grades 1 thru 5). My job is basically to introduce the video lesson that gets projected onto a huge screen and then to quiz the kids when the video is over. The kids are divided into teams and each team is given points, awarded with plastic balls, for each question answered correctly. When it came time to tally up the points and find a winner, this is what I said, “Being on God’s Team, we are all winners but let’s see which team here has more balls.” Apparently, kids aren’t the only ones that “say the darnedest things.” The moment it came out of my mouth, I knew I made a boo-boo; and that was confirmed by the expression of silent chuckles on the faces of all the adults in the room. Thankfully, I don’t think any of the kids are familiar enough with the lewd figure of speech to understand it. Thankfully, God has a sense of humor (I’m proof). Most importantly, God is a God of second chances so they may still let me work with the kids again next week.

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3 responses to “Who has more balls?

  1. Unfortunately, I was emceeing an awards banquet at a charity golf tournament and made the statement “For John Doe, the oldest golfer in the tournament, we have a new set of balls.” The golfers DID understand what I had said, and it took 10 minutes to calm the room down.

    I think people are the best evidence of God’s great sense of humor.

  2. It’s funny when old figures of speech sneak into what you’re saying sometimes….I can’t count the number of times embarassing things have come out over the years. I volunteered as Youth Director for a while and I’m glad many of the kids never “got” the embarassing things I said! I guess that’s what happens when you had 27 years of non-Christian things entering your mind and fermenting.

  3. My dad is a Baptist minister. One Sunday he was trying to draw attention to a particular section of a verse. He asked everyone to please look at the “but after the colon.” Most folks simply looked for the word “but” located after the punctuation mark “colon.” The librarian from the local high school (who is also a grammar buff) laughed so hard she had to leave the choir loft.

    Thanks for stopping by my site. I like your writing. I’ll be by here more often.

    Pray for me, I’m a sinner,
    -Andrew

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